Dhihaar
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One of the expressions of the first Jaahiliyyah ( the age before Islaam ) that is still widespread in this Ummah ( nation ) is the phenomenon of dhihaar , whereby a man says to his wife : " " You are to me like the back of my mother , or : You are as forbidden for me as is my sister " , and other similarly ugly statements whose repulsive nature was confirmed by the Sharee'ah ( divine law ) because of the oppression it involved towards women . Allah referred to this in the Qur'aans
:
"
Those among you who make their wives unlawful to them by saying to them , ' You are like my mother's back, ' they cannot be their mothers . None can be their mothers except those who gave them birth . And verily , they utter an ill word and a lie . And verily , Allaah is Oft-Pardoning , Oft-Forgiving
. "
[ Surah al-Mujaadilah (58):2 ]
The Sharee'ah has imposed a heavy penalty ( kaffaarah ) for this crime , similar to that required for killing a person by mistake or for having intercourse during the day in Ramadaan ; the person who has committed dhihaar is not permitted to approach his wife until he has paid this penalty . Allaah says
:
"
And those who make unlawful to them ( their wives ) ( by dhihaar ) , and wish to free themselves from what they uttered , ( the penalty ) in that case ( is ) the freeing of a slave before they touch each other . That is an admonition to you ( so that you may not return to such an ill thing ) . And Allaah is All-Aware of what you do . * And he who finds not ( the money for freeing a slave ) must fast two successive months before they both touch each other . And for him who is unable to do so , he should feed sixty miskeen ( poor ) . That is in order that you may have perfect Faith in Allaah and His Messenger . And for disbelievers , there is a painful torment
. "
[ Surah al-Mujaadilah (58) : 3 – 4 ]
